I’ve always hated crap research dressed up to be meaningful, and the latest that falls into the category is from ntl Telewest.

It sent out a press release screaming “Parents stumped by presents lists - what kids wheely want this Christmas!”, which went on to claim that anyone with kids was no longer with it enough to understand a Christmas list.

“Gadgets such as Heelys, Wiis, PVRs and Robosapiens feature high on kids' Christmas wish lists this year, but new research shows parents are struggling to decipher them. Research commissioned by ntl Telewest reveals today's most desirable 'toys' have such confusing names that parents are turning to their children to translate,” said ntl.

Clearly, all parents are too stupid in ntl’s eyes to work out what most of these toys are, but it only takes a brief look down the list of examples to see ntl doesn’t know what kids want for Christmas.

Among the list of tech toys children want – and only 15 per cent of parents understood the term – is VoD. Now, ntl, show me just one child in the land that has asked for Video on Demand this Christmas. And frankly I’m dubious about the PVR and Blackberry claims. What child or teenager asks for a Blackberry for Christmas?

With few exceptions, over half of the parents questioned did understand the tech terms.

Clearly ntl is just trying to push some of its services and of course it has got it’s cheap publicity – because I’ve slagged it and its research off here.

The full table of parental horror - % that understood the terms:
Term                          Percent
PVR                           23.53%
Set top box                79.76%
Wii                            62.12%
HDTV                         82.12%
VoD                           15.29%
MP3                           87.06%
Xbox 360                    86.59%
PS3                            79.76%
Heelys                        22.12%
Blackberry                  77.88%
Cranium                     54.12%
Bratz                          76.47%
Geomag                     30.35%
Robosapien                70.82%
Bop It Extreme           40.00%